Best Way to Compensate Family Caregivers – Mediation!

 The number of elders is growing by leaps and bounds, as well as the number of adult children who are caring for an aging loved one. 

Med Life's study found that one in four adult children care for an aging parent and often those caregivers lose wages, pension funds and Social Security benefits to the tune of $3 trillion per year. That is a lot of "punishment" for truly good deeds. 

A family caregiver will often have to quit their job to provide that care for their loved one. While others continue to work, they often lose paid hours due to family emergencies. 

Many are also balancing their own families' needs with the needs of their aging parents. They need support from their siblings, and other service agencies. 

Many will also need financial support before their caregiving role is completed. When families start dealing with money, trouble usually follows. 

Mediation experts say that money is a top reason why many families have conflict over mom or dad's care. The non-care giving siblings often feel guilt for not contributing, but not to the point they want to help their care-giving sibling financially. 

Many older adults have the means to help, or bequeath a larger portion of their estate to their care-giving child, but this often causes problems between the siblings when their love and support is needed most. 

So, how can these problems be avoided? Experts say the key is for all parties to listen. 

Mediation can keep families out of court, which saves money in the long run. They also provide a safe place where all conversations are deemed confidential. 

The courts have upheld this. Once all family members understand the situation, and what their aging parent wants, progress usually follows, along with compassion. 

The average cost of mediation is estimated to be $300 to $500 per hour, which is a fraction of what attorney's charge for going to court. Court rulings rarely keep the family unity. 

Mediation can often save relationships which are vital to all parties involved. Some might say that this makes mediation priceless.

Mediation counselors often work on a small issue at first and really urge the family to get all agreements in writing. Once a small issue has been worked out, often everyone feels more confident to work on the larger issues. 

Counselors do their best to have the elders involved, even if they suffer from cognitive issues. Knowing the parents' wishes can bring many families together. 

Often elders are reluctant to tell all their children their desires for fear that they'll disapprove. Mediation counselors can often cut through this reluctance. 

So before tempers and bankbooks get out of control, you might strongly consider family mediation. It could save your family unity and your financial stability. 

Here at San Clemente Villas, we maintain a list of tried and proven mediators in Orange County. Just call us with your needs and we can refer you to a list of them.

San Clemente Villas provides full-service, luxury assisted living to those over the age of 65. San Clemente Villas by the Sea is at 660 Camino De Los Mares, San Clemente, CA 92673. Phone: (949) 289-1534| Fax: (949) 234-0081. Contact: Aileen Brazeau, Co-Owner of San Clemente Villas by the Sea. www.SanClementeVillas.com | abrazeau@cox.net.